All too often we hear the mantra - "life is unfair". Personally I've grown tired of people throwing the phrase out there as they look down their nose at the poor, the unlucky, the screwed, the destitute and the fucked. This scenario plays out in many ways, but typically ends the same: "You lost your job because your company outsourced it to India? Too bad. Life's just not fair. Deal with it."; "Can't get out from the debt of your student loans? Maybe you shouldn't have majored in Art! Life's unfair kid."; "You can't get health care insurance because you have diabetes? Sounds like your problem. Life just isn't fair."; "Lost your house because a bank illegally foreclosed on it? Life is in no way fair buddy. Learn to live with it."
The first thought that crosses my mind is, simply: Why is life unfair?
The second thought typically comes quickly afterwards: If life is unfair, why is that okay?
In thinking about it, I just don't believe that life is unfair. Rather, it makes a lot more sense when you shine a light and see that it is a cop-out that the well-to-do have formulated for themselves.
How can I get out of helping others who are more destitute than myself AND also quell this damn guilt? Ahh! Life is UNFAIR! Ding!
The phrase becomes quite convenient in that light. Why actually DO something when you can just pop that beauty out, pin it to their forehead, and walk away? And this answers the second question - it's
not okay. But we've been beaten down to the point that we think it is. Truly, that is a sad revelation.
So I've devised a way to counter anyone who spews the entire "life is unfair" argument...
It's a nice, warm sunny day as you are driving home from the store with your wife and son when you come to a red light and stop. At that moment, 2 men come up to your car and before you can drive away, they subdue you, then kidnap your wife and son.
Question - Do you call the cops?
If you truly believe that
life IS unfair, you would actually not call the cops. Rather, you would say to yourself: "well mack, life is unfair. Yeah the wife is gone, but there's plenty of other fish in the sea. And, yeah, kiddo is gone too, but I have the ability to create another. And, really, this was bound to happen sooner or later. Life is just unfair like that. And at least you came out of it unharmed. So, naw, no need to call the cops. It's just time to drive on home and see what my ex-girlfriend is up to."
If you believe that, I have a friendly tiger to sell you.
This is how the situation would go down in reality - Mr. Life Is Unfair would first probably wreck his car [if not downright maim/kill innocent bystanders] in an attempt to chase down the perps. As smoke billows up to the sky from the crashed car, he'll continue the pursuit on foot. When that becomes futile, he will call the cops, then the FBI, and Homeland Security, and anyone else he can think of who might help rectify the situation.
Morever, he would probably pull out a tire iron and beat your ass bloody if you dared to mention to him at that moment that,
hey fella, just let it roll off your back man, afterall life is unfair!
Why would he act this way? That answer is obvious -
the bad thing happened to HIM. And it wasn't a minor bad thing, such as the grocery store being out of his favorite type of hot tea. Nope. This was a major, big-time bad thing. And there isn't a band aid large enough to cover the wound. All of a sudden, life being unfair isn't good enough. He wants results and resolution. He wants someone to tell him that it will be okay. He wants a hug, a good one.
And when his wife is found tortured, raped and dead in an alley dumpster, and his son found dead next to her, Mr. Life Is Unfair will probably not want to go to work that day. Or the next. Or perhaps for the rest of that month. In the end, he might not have known it initially, but he'll know it then that it's a damn good thing he has short-term disability he can tap into.
Moral of the story - the next time someone tells you to just deal because life is unfair, ask them if they would call the cops if their wife was kidnapped...and then school them when they say "Yes, of course I would!"